Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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baby loves lalma

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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Q: what's red and goes up and down? A: a tomato in an elevator

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Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

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Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

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10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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Potato.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

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Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

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roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

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Why was Steve buried in Australia? Because he was dead.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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Why does Lady GaGa have no hair down there? It's physically impossible to grow hair on your toenails.

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops