Two women were sitting quietly.

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Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

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Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

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What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a wild dog on the other side, so he crossed the road to avoid potential danger.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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potatoes

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What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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Yo mama so fat,we are all very concerned for her health.

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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if a kayak was stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes stacked will it take to get to the moon? none because snakes dont have armpits

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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What happened to the alligator who waled into a bar? He was killed and skinned by swamp hunters in Louisiana.

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops