42.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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Pickles

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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How did the guy in a wheelchair get up 7 flights of stairs? He didn't.

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

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Obama enters a KKK meeting Obama: Oh sorry I thought this was the Kentucky Fried Chicken... the font was so small so... as he starts backing off scared... KKK: leader, of course Mr.President, feel free to come again anytime! Moral: Kings Knocking Ketchup is actually a nice place if you not unlike me enjoy ketchup...

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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