white or wheat? wheat please.

How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

Q) Why did the Koala fall out of the tree A) Because it was dead!

If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

Niall Horan

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

eoin burgin is fat

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

what goes in hard and comes out soft? bubblegum, what were you thinking?

69

What's the difference between black guy and a bucket of shit? The bucket

Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...