- Anti Joke

Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

Knock-knock jokes with sjws: Knock knock! Who's there? A transgender! A transgender who? WOW. It's 2016, people. If you can't recognize a transgender, you're a disgusting piece of cis white male scum! OH! OHH! "I'm sorry lady"? Do I LOOK like a lady to you? I'm a- no- sir- stop interrupting me. SIR! I identify as a gender fluid demisexual! "What does that matter?" Oh my god. Well it wouldn't matter if I identified as a goddamn piece of salami to you would it??? Huh? I'm confusing you? WOW! What a priveleged- oh! So I'M being rude? OKAY! FINE! I'm recording this you know. You're going ALL over the Internet. Oh yes you are! No, hey, my privilege cam! You just took it this is rape! You are assaulting me! Don't just shove it back into my hands like that! I call patriarchy! Oh no, I'm not done with you! Don't you close that door you Goddamn piece of sh- slam

Why'd the bird in Ohio fall out of its nest? There was a squirrel that was eaten by a large eagle. The eagle then flew to Ohio and died. Then, a large dog grabbed the Eagles corpse and brought it to his owner. The owner then decided to have it for dinner. Inside the eagle, he found the squirrels bones. He put the bones in a catapult, and sent them flying. The bones hit a car and the car slipped off the road and into a river. Then, a whale put the car on its back and swam to the shore. At the shore, the whale got stranded and sadly died. Crabs surrounded the whale and ate it. One crab then ran away and up a tree. It found a stapler and a rubber dinosaur mask and gave it to a chipmunk. The chipmunk climbed up the tree, stapled nuts into the birds eyes and stapled the rubber dinosaur mask to its face, the bird got scared, and then all of the sudden the chipmunk stapled itself to the birds back. The birds family then came and shoved the two out of the tree because they hated chipmunks, and their son Timmy the bird was a disappointment. The bird and the chipmunk fell and died. That is why the bird fell.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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