What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

YOU'VE WON A FREE IPAD!!!!! PRESS CTRL+W TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE!

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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