There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

thumb_up thumb_down +33

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Double-whammy

thumb_up thumb_down +31

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops