BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the army guy say when he lost his gun. Wheres my gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Rishi has popcorn while wass n jess r making jokes on anti jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

thumb_up thumb_down -17

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops