Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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Did u know that 10/10 people die?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What Did Sally Get For Christmas? A Bicycle

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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Knock Knock the door's open, come in

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops