A bartender walks into a bar. He serves alcohol for a living.

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

how many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? none, they hire mexicans to do it

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

My mother in law fell down a wishing well, i was amazed, i never new they actually worked

What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

11th September jokes are just plane wrong.

What's up? Your time.

Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

who looks like a double rainbow? gun baby who was pregant and rapes her

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because you touch yourself at night.

Why did Sally sell seashells by the seashore? Because she has no arms and couldn't find a job.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 was a sixoffender!

Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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