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A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

How do you call a black person in KFC? By a Phone.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

What did the black guy say to the Jewish guy when it began to rain? It's raining.

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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