what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

The Oakland Raiders

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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