why did the kid die? his mom shot him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

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Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

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Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops