A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

what's brown and sticky? A Stick

How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

Read a Book.

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

Q) Why did the Koala fall out of the tree A) Because it was dead!

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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