What's brown and has four wheels? Wood, I lied about the wheels.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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roses are red violets are blue im in class i shouldnt be on this

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What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny?

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into a worm and finding an apple in it.

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Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

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What did the down syndrome kid get for christmas? Pulmonary Embolisms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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