How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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AIDS.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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What did the Polish man say to his doctor? "Witam, doktorze. By?em kaszel z ostatnich kilku tygodni i jest wysypka na moim lewym ramieniu. Czy jest co? co mo?na zrobi?, aby mi pomóc?" I don't know what it means, either.

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boobs!

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

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Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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One day a married couple have a conversation. The husband says, "Make me a sandwich." The wife says, "Okay, what do you want on it?"

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Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

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What do you call a black lady with big boobs? Oh, wait, it's just a fat black guy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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