Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

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What dosent kill you only makes you injured

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

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Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk die and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Actually, that's just speculation. No one really knows what happens when you die. Most likely your consciousness simply stops, and you cease to exist, an eternity of oblivion. But most people can't face this possibility so we have made up comforting stories to attempt to ease our collective fear of death.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels.

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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

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How Many polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, one person is capable of screwing in a light bulb. Unless they were mentally challenged, in which case, they would get someone else to do it for them.

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Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

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whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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A man walks into a metal bar He had a swell time.

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Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

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the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

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Why bouriquet laugh ? cause hes mom get hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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