Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

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Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

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??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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A man is at a party. He gets hungry so he waits in the foodline and then he gets some food. Then he has to go to the bathroom so he waits in the bathroomline and goes to the bathroom. Then he is thirsty so he goes to get some punch and realizes that there is no punchline.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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