Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

Why was the prison full of black people? Because they were all their for security internships.

It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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