Ask me if I'm a tree? Are you a tree? No.

What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor and the doctor said "There is no cure for the monkeys in your head"

Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A miracle

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

How scoops of ice cream does a n*gger get? 0.

I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

Whats worse then 10 black men hanging from trees? Kittens

hello? knock knock. you called me, why are you saying knock knock?

Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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