How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

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You might be a redneck if you have red on your neck

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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justin Beiber is gay. what else is there to say...

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If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Check this web out www.hurr-durr.com

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Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Captchas.

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P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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