How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

thumb_up thumb_down -42

The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

thumb_up thumb_down -46

if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -48

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Marla should be home by now, it's nearly 6." He was unaware he had lost his tractor until the next morning.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

thumb_up thumb_down -48

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

thumb_up thumb_down -50

So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -52

what do you call a guy with no arm and legs laying by the door? Matt! what do you call a guy with no arms and legs floating on water Bob!

thumb_up thumb_down -52

How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Vicky is my best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops