How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

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Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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what do they do to dead Mexicans? skin them and make them in to wet suites.

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Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

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A white guy, spanish guy, and a black guy jump off a roof. They were all killed on impact and their families will mourn their loss for years to come.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

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Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

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You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

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mangos mandarins mushrooms mustache :{

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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Neil Lewis

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

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What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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if 5+5=10 then 7+9=52

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So this guy walks into a bar, & says "I'll have a beer"........ Yup

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you through them.

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epic win?

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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