What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To go to work. And be sexually harassed. For 70 cents on the dollar.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

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Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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