Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

what's brown and sticky A stick!

what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

Why did Rosie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus...

Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

What's black and fast? A treadmill.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm ovulating

no really what are ur names?

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

what do u call a turtle with no shell? Larry

Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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