Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

why did the man die? he had cancer

Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

if 5+5=10 then 7+9=52

how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

What is black and white and sleeps a lot? A tired zebra.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...