What did the three blind mice say to the priest? I'm blind :(

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What happened to the boy who survived a tragic car accident?? He stepped out of the car and got hit by a semi.

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One below was by me: Walter H

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You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

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What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Why did the Asian man go into space? Because he was an astronaut.

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Q: which of the following is a prime number? A: 17

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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Why does people with tourettes curse so much? Fuck should I know?

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A caar pllus itno a graege. You are probably dyslexic.

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a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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