Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

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What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

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I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

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why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

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Caca.

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That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, It's still in its pen.

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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