What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

Michel Moor on a die...

What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

Nick Cannon

What's worse than a gay joke? Their emotional repercussions, leading to a lack of self-esteem, which eventually drives the homosexual to commit suicide, leaving behind a now destroyed family.

So a moose, a deer, and a horse walk into a bar. One of the people at the bar was a hunter who was carrying his gun. Several people got up and left after they realized the potential danger of the situation.

What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A mailman walks into a bar He delivers a bill for the electricity and leaves.

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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