What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Legal Mexicans in Texas

thumb_up thumb_down +19

KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

thumb_up thumb_down +19

My Nan, that is all.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the heaviest part of an elephant? Its body.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do u make Michael Jackson cry Dead people can't cry you dumb bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Who shit in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Want to hear a joke? Me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops