A man walks into a bar and says "ouch".

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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what's worse than getting beaten by police? Getting beaten by Russian police

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knock knock who's there who who who who who what are you a retarded owl

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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Whats not funny and no one wants to waste the time to reading it? This joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

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How did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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What's worse than breaking your neck on a trampoline? Getting in a car crash on the way to the hospital.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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