If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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what did the old lady die of old age...

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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Boy, do I love chicken strips. Sometimes, when I’m home alone, I’ll take some chicken strips fresh out of the oven and rub them in my scalp. It doesn’t do much for my hair health, but I like the way they feel running through my strands of hair. The flakey coating, smooth white meat, and warmth. Yum.

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Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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What did the goat say to the zebra? Nothing. Goats can't speak

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nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

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What's the difference between ice cream and babies? I don't stick babies in my freezer...

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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one morning i turned on my tv

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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What's ugly and has shit smeared over its teeth? Smelly McD (He also wears bin bag clothes)

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What's big and juicy and liked to be sucked by women? A penis.

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What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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