I don't think Holocaust jokes are funny, Anne Frankly I find them offensive.

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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A zebra dies and goes to animal heaven. All the animals around him are trotting, flying, jumping, each according to its own species, in the kind of bliss that only eternity can bring. But the zebra is not impressed and mopes through heaven's green fields. A giraffe notices his languid stupor and asks, "Why so glum, pal?" The zebra mournfully replies, "All my life I've wondered if I was black with white stripes or white with black stripes." The giraffe, hoping to get the zebra to some answers as quickly as possible, suggests, "Why not go as God?" The zebra, somewhat taken aback by the notion that God might give him an audience, replies, "Oh, I can do that?" The giraffe says, "Sure, I'll show you the way!" The giraffe leads the zebra to a great tabernacle of gold and points the way up a long stairway of diamond. The zebra follows the stairs up to two great ivory doors. But no matter what he tried, the zebra couldn't get the door open. The only animals that could open the door for him would be the primates because of their opposable digits, but the zebra wasn't much of a social animal, so he didn't have any friends. He spent eternity with no answer to his question.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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Major League Soccer

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Somebody else besides you: what time is it? You: what time is what? SOmebody else: ? What?

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

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Why? Why Not?

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Why was the boy hit by a bus? Because the driver is a homicidal sociopath.

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

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Why didn't the black man eat lunch? Because his lunch asked him not to eat it.

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Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

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whats 2+2 equal? 4

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What do you call a limbless woman on a beach? Sandy

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Q. Why did the 40 year old woman puts on a large amount of makeup? A. She may have gerontophobia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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