- Anti Joke

What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

Where did Jonathon go after he died? - Burger King, he died from diabetes

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

Q: Why do black people drink Grape Soda? A: Because it queches their thirst, and satisfies them.

Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

Why did Sally cross the street? Because someone was gonna rape her if she didn't.

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the muslim say to the jew. Hello

Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

Nice belt.

Yo Mamma's so dumb... She cannot manage to find a decent job without her GED.

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

What's funnier than Justin Bieber dying in a car accident? Nicky Minaj being in the same car.

How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

Whats more realistic than evolution? Everything

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.