Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

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Did you hear about the cannibal who ate the Olympic record sprinter? He's in prison for first-degree murder & crimes against humanity.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. His face bumped into something that was soft, squishy, smooth, and round... It was a balloon. Someone was having a birthday party.

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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It's all Taggart

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What do you call a man looking at Anti jokes on this ? you

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

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whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

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What looks like a duck, smells like a duck and feels like a duck? A duck.

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a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Hearing this joke again.

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What time do you go to the dentist? Depends on the appointment.

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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An man walks to a bra

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What's black and white and red all over A bloody penguin

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It has been this way for two days now. Whenever he looks over his shoulder and past his wing, he can see them there. Following him. The men with the red eyes. He doesn't know what they want and doesn't want to find out. He crosses that road as he has crossed so many others recently, squawking and shuffling along on his stubby legs, darting through traffic in a risky effort to shake them off of his tailfeathers. He gets to the other side and ascends the curb, walking beak-first into a pair of legs hidden beneath a grey robe. He looks up and sees a pair of eyes like burning coals staring down at him from within the darkness of a hood. He tries to run, but it is too late. He has been taken. His wings and fingers are forfeit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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