A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

42

Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because seven "eight" nine. Yeah, I went there.

your a vagina says you, you're a tit

Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

what do you call a woman that didnt make you a sandwich? An ambulance

Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for them. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed next to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

why couldnt the kid get off the couch when his mom asked him to? he was paralyzed

What did david give back? Nothing.

men

what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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