Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Again, what is it called when you are safely inside at winter your power is out, but the streets are full of people as the weather gets really bad and people start bouncing around? Blizzard Entertainment. What is it called when a robot lets out gas? Electronic fArts.

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Where does a successful black person live? Neverland.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? They practice.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

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What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

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What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

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Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

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roses are red violets r blue jump off a building no one likes u

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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