what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

Do you want to hear a joke? No. Women's- oh, okay.

A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

why did the fat lady hop on one foot,because she lost the other foot to diabetes. ?

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

Q: What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit

why did the dog eat its breakfast of meat because he was hungry

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

One dark, stormy night, there was a man, limping slowly down the road. He looked across the road and noticed a little girl on a park bench. He carefully moved around behind , creeped up, and slowly tapped her on the shoulder. I tap 2 tap 3 tap The little girl slowly turned her head, and as she did, the man uttered 3 sentences.... "Would you mind helping me get back to my apartment, my hand was cut off in the war, while I was serving my country, which is why I have a hook as opposed to a hand. I was heading back to my apartment to greet my wife and 2 little children, since I just got back from a long day's work at the soup kitchen, helping those in need, and I sprained my ankle. By the way, my name I John Thompson."

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender quickly says to its owner that he must leave as dogs are not allowed in. Upon realizing that it is a seeing eye dog, the bartender retracts his statement and serves the owner a drink.

When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

What happened when a saxophone hit Sally? She had a concussion.

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

whats good about poland... fukk all

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

Roses are red violets are blue suck my **** and I'll **** you too

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

Why is that chicken crossing the ro-..... oh, woops, he got run over by that truck...

Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...