Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

Did you hear about that superman guy? He died.

What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

A fifteen-year-old walks into a bar. He is told to leave by the tender because of his obvious prepubescent appearance, deeming him far from the legal age of drinking.

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

A: What happened to the snake? B: It died

How did sonic run at the speed of sound because he was fast

Can you say the word "toy boat" 10 times fast? No

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

A mexican pedophile stalks a child home. He molests him.

What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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