How many ADD teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? Most likely only one. With advances in modern medicine, adolescents are experiencing large improvements in their abilities to focus on things from schoolwork to lightbulb changing!

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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42, that is all

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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why am i a dick head. because my gcse's spelt fudge and i dont like fudge so i project my anger into boss things

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what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

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Like this joke, bitch.

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yes... that's the joke

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

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How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

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Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

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I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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Christopher Walken steps into a bar.

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YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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