Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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GONNA

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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why did the little boy drop his icecream? he was hit by a train

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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Q: A young friend you met on the internet invites you over to his house. When you arrive, Chris Hansen enters the room. What does he say? A: Welcome to our home

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if quizzes are quizzical, arent tests testical?

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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A Sloth runs...

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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