squirrels with massive bonerss

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

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What can eat, sleep, and reproduce? Not a rock, that's for sure.

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Flop dog

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

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Why does Sally sell sea shells down by the sea shore? To support her growing crack addiction that is ruining Sally's and Sally's families lives

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

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Q. If Kim Kardashian and Kanye West were both drowning, what kind would you make? A. PBJ

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Hey dude, wanna come with me!!!! Sure, where? ON YOUR FACE!!!!!! -_- ........ok sure why not

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why couldn't randy turn on his computer? randy is blind and had mistaken his refrigerator for his computer.

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why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

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Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

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why did the man die? he was shot

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How many carrots can you fit in a truck Depends who's driving

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops