Your mom is fat

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Oh, then I'm not opening the door.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

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What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

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What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Roses are pink. Violets are pink. The brony just took a dump. Don't give me that shit!

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WHat did Helen Keller get for Christmas? an ipod

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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God has lived since the eternal eternity right? And one day he said let there be light? NO WONDER HE IS SUCH A NEEDY GREEDY EVIL FUCK! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL AFTER AEONS ENDLESS IN TOTAL DARKNESS? Moral: It is time for the prince, to stand up as the emperor, then no one shall doubt the power of the moral man.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

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The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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It's only racist if you consider them people.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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