What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats 2 + 2? a black guy flying a kite

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A midget walks under a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

trumpy trumpy trump

thumb_up thumb_down +33

i have an apple. now suck my dick

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: What do you call Justin Bieber with a penis? A: Darn good plastic surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

thumb_up thumb_down +31

I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

thumb_up thumb_down +31

1. In 2010, 8.8 million people fell ill with Tuberculosis. 2. Up to 70,000 children died in 2010 due to Tuberculosis. 3. Tuberculosis is the leading killer of people living with HIV with 1.4 million deaths. 4. Death from Tuberculosis has dropped 40% since 1990. 5. No country has ever eliminated Tuberculosis entirely. 6. About 46 million Tuberculosis patients have been successfully treated since 1995. 7. Children under 5 years old rarely get the disease. 8. Edgar Allen Poe’s mother, foster mother, and wife all died of Tuberculosis. 9. It can take up to 12 months to recover from Tuberculosis. 10. People with tuberculosis have symptoms such as cough that “won’t go away”, a cough that brings up blood, a fever lasting longer than 2 weeks, night sweats, fatigue, or noticeable amounts of acute weight loss. 11. Nearly 2 million people die from tuberculosis yearly. 12. Tuberculosis kills 5,000 people daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops