How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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I'm a champion. I do what I want.

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

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What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll order The Special, what's wrong with you?

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? Bananas don't scream as much when you peel them.

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roses are red violets are blue ur family is dead and u will die too

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Your mom is fat

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Jesus was a good guy

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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