Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

what did the blind deaf orphan get for christmas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Boss: Do you know what lazy means? Employer: Yes, adopting a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is more worse than death? Death

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who's there? I said who's there? The man opens the door to find there was no one there and begins to shake in fear as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops