- Anti Joke

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

What black and white and red all over? A panther I was lying about the red and white.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Man 1: Nock-nock Man 2: Please leave my place of residence

Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

Q: Why is the Universe so big? A: Because it is the same size as my penis.