Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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MILEY CYRUS: ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME! ME: O GOD CALLED HE SAID YOUR A HOE TO

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How did bob Marley quit doing Drugs?

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What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

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what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

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YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

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What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

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What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

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What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

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What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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Why Is Jarrod spencer gay Coz he is

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What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

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One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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