why?

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

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what was hitlers rap album called? straight outta mein kampfton

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Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

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Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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What is cold? Winter

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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