A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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What's worse than 1,000 babies stapled to 1,000 trees? 1001 babies stapled to 1001 trees.

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Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

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how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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why do black people hate chainsaws? the noise they make- run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run nigga nigga

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

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Your Mom.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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I'd type a joke about dicks but it's too long.

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Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

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One cold winter day in Russia, a man asked a tree if he was cold. The tree did not reply, and the man became depressed.

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Why didn't the black man brush his teeth today? Because he was already too late for work.

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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Hey guys wanna here a joke? Never mind it was a gay joke but f**k it.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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what starts with b and ends with itch pickle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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