Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

A British man walks into a dental office.

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

What's dead? Your mum.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

where are you?

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

Cold camel scrotum.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...